May 31st
2:07 AM
2:07 AM
a message from Anonymous
I bet he's chained up and screaming for mercy right now..
Just stop…
Laced With Venom, Rain Down On Me - @Skyler
Skyler was to weak to protest. To tired to try and point out that it was morning and he didn’t want Alora wasting her day on him. But she had already woven her fingers into his and was pulling his trembling person into their bedroom; the white nest of material still curled and creased from where the two youths had laid in amongst them.
With a sniff Skyler scrubbed at his eyes with the coarse fabric of his shirt sleeve; dragging any reminanse of tears from their place. Erasing the silvery tracks of the fallen. It felt nice, sliding into the cool presence of the sheets. Tired head falling into the plump pillow, his hair fanning out like loops of gold thread across the material.
Skyler bore the battle scars of what months of physical and mental abuse do to a person. His face; mottled and ma-zed with the sponge effect splodges of violet that had almost faded to invisibility. Heavily hung lower lids that craved sleep; chapped lips that needed moisture. Skyler was a mess inside and out but next to him, her hands still folded into his own, dark voids of colour, bottomless and infinite baring into his was all the medication he needed. She was his antidote despite her belief to be his venom. She was what would eventually bring him back out into the light and out of the dark.
Skyler snuggled into her, like a child craving contact. His arms curling around her neck, head lost in her chest. Tears stabbed behind his closed lids; the drops a result of fatigue, weariness and more obviously sadness. He needed to cry, to let all the poison drip from within before the pair tried to rebuild and cover over the cracks in his foundations. So thats what he did he cried. Harrowing sobs making his chest jolt. A salty wash drenching her shirt.
“I was never a bad person ‘Lor…I just did bad things.” Skylers statement was open and empty; up for interpretation. He decided that after moths of holding his burdens close and keeping his secrets locked away that he owed Alora in sight into a world he wanted to forget. “I think I owe it to you…I think you deserve to know everything.”
Alora didn’t expect any protest on Skyler’s part. He was weak, tired, physically and mentally exhausted. He was in the process of shutting down, circuitry by circuitry failing to uphold the weight of such burdens on his shoulders. Even though he was worn, Alora knew the bed was appealing. It was soft, laced with memories that actually held the good in their relationship, the cuddling, the intimacy, the talks that lasted way into the night. It would take time, but Skyler would heal.
The girl made sure that Skyler laid down first, Alora perching herself on the edge of mattress. Skyler’s head hit the pillow, rubbing away the streaks of tears that had stained his cheeks. Even then, he looked handsome, regardless of the old look that came with his accumulation of stress, even with his golden curls that seemed to hold traces of dullness, even with his pupils that lacked luster. Skyler was always precious to Alora and that wouldn’t change.
The instant Alora snuggled up to Skyler, he began to sob, heaving and retching. Tears rolled out from his sockets, leaving traces of red amongst his pupils. Her fingers trailed down Skyler’s forearm, lacing them together, slits fitting perfectly. She began to hum lightly, rhythmically and soft, hoping to bring the slightest calm that she could muster. “You’re going to be okay,” Alora whispered. “Just let it out.” Her free hand ran along the arch of his spine, circling and massaging the delicate skin.
Suddenly, Skyler said something that made Alora’s brow quirk up. She craned her neck to get a better view of the boy whom she loved. “What do you mean?” She asked, but her tone was not harsh. She squeezed Skyler’s palm tightly in her grasp. “You can tell me anything, whatever it takes, especially if it helps.”
It felt like a life time ago now. When he was trapped in that chamber; those four walls pressing in like a vice. Those chains; manacles tight at his wrists. Rubbing the skin to raw bloody mess. Skin curling up as the scolding iron pressed against his chest. Blood welling from the strips ripped into existence from thick wire that slashed across his torso. Those injuries now faded to scars; soft hatching’s up and across his body. Faint white lines that shimmered silver in certain lights. They like the two slitted stab wounds one just below his right collar bone, the other under his left rib were reminders. Daily reminders of what he had done.
“Well…” he cleared his throat, coaxing her arm around his back so he could curl up into the curve of her arm “I can’t remember how much I told you about…about the torture. But a few months back there was a murder remember? and well the government took people in to be questioned. I was taken in. Spent hours. They branded me..they whipped me. Let me bleed but I wouldn’t talk…I didn’t know anything so I just kinda laughed and so it got worse..so bad I thought I was going to die.” Skylers mouths was dry; razored tumble weeds dragging down as he swallowed every sentence. This was the first time he had gone into detail about what had happened and every recalled memory caused another tendon to twitch and finger to flinch.
“Alex. It was Alex..but he was only doing his job and then when I honestly didn’t think I had anything else to lose I bargined with them. For my life.I said I would help them. Do anything I could…cowardly..yes but I was so scared.” One of his palms curled into a fist the blood refusing to circulate evenly as the skin stretched white. “So I sold my soul essentially..I was their bitch for months. I didn’t want to do it and I tried every way I could to get out of it but they said they’d kill me if I did anything wrong and they didn’t exactly let me forget it..a constant reminder.”
His lungs felt bruised as he exhaled. Angry sobs causing his chest to feel as battered as it had weeks ago. His fragile foundations seemed to weaken every time she whispered something soothing; her care and concern a welcome friend in this otherwise whirlwind of painful recollections and memories. He had to brace himself for the next point he was about to make. Determined that he’d spill his own sins to make Alora feel better about committing her own.
“Then came the worst part…what they asked...told me I had to do next…” Skyler clenched his jaw, burrowing his head into the crook of her elbow.
Laced With Venom, Rain Down On Me - @Skyler
The insides of his mouth tasted like blood; every word swallowed felt like a razor blade, ripping the soft skin to shreds. He was choking on his own words stuttering instead of speaking. This lack of control making it harder for him to come to terms with the raw show he was putting on for Alora.
She’d seen him cry; skyler was too emotionally damaged for her to not see him cry at least once.But these crys were different they were fuelled by an army of different emotions that for oncce were winning and had chosen to bring him and his work force down with it.
“I…I just thought you..wanted to go..because of me.” he shivered despite it being warm. A shiver of sadness rather than a temperature related motion. Skyler pushed into her, his ligaments twisted up in the soft material of her shirt; chest heaving as he struggled to regain rhythm. “I love you too in a way..I don’t think I could ever explain. You’re everything to me ALora.”
Her words ran through his ears as swiftly as a silver ribbon; the string beginning to tie to the loose soul back together. Skyler wasn’t unfix able. He’d done bad things; terrible things. But he wasn’t a bad person and neither was Alora. She just like the other was lost in the mayhem and heartache of confusion, confusion that this train wreck of a town just amplified. The two snapped together as simply and effectively as a two piece jigsaw; one without the other and the final picture would never be complete and you’d never seen the rich artistry the the finished product held.
Thats what they were an intricate picture of the most delicate strokes and pen lines; colour and tone swirling and twisting to created a piece of art like no other. Without Alora skyler would be worse; Without Skyler ALora would be worse and both youths knew this and thats why it hurt so much.
A knot loosened in his abdomen, untying; releasing an ounce of tension that was held as Aloras butter soft lips touched his own for just a second; her arms cradling him in the way he craved. She was telling him she loved him, confirming something he already knew. But it felt beautiful none the less; her voice sung like the sweet morning call of a bird. I love you too. Her sobs were slower than his but it still made his heartache and despite his weakness he still wrapped his arms around her back as he tried to comfort her in whatever way he could.
“I need help.” Skyler shook, clenching his palms into concrete fists behind her; nails digging dangerously into the fleshy skin of his palm. “But I feel bad it’s always you who has to help me…I’m sorry I’m so weak ‘Lor. I’m sorry I’m not better, you mean so much to me…I’ll do anything to change.” he snuggled into the hollow of her neck, exhaling heavily; relieved that she had promised to stay.
He wanted her. He needed her. He loved her.
“No, Sky…it was never that reason,” Alora replied, her voice effortlessly falling out from her mouth. She kept her hand under his chin, holding up his head that strained to rise. He was so broken, so lost, so utterly upset with the world and how far he had let himself be pushed. “I just thought that it would be better if I left.. that I was the reason for why you’re so hurt.” She sighed, pressing her forehead to his and allowing his hands to tangle in the hem of her shirt once more. “I know you do. You don’t have to explain.”
Even if Skyler didn’t blame Alora for the mess, she still would because her actions were not desirable nor did they produce positive results. They triggered a fight, a separation from her mindset that led to a near death of Neil. She was so close to killing him too; to watching the final breaths vanish from his body. And yet Skyler overlooked that. He was too good for her. It always would be that way or at least that’s how Alora saw it.
Alora suddenly felt Skyler’s tight grip amongst her own, nails leaving crescent indents into her flesh. She didn’t mind as long as it made him feel better, as long as it guaranteed him some consolation. “I know, but you admitted it. That’s what counts. We’ll work on it, okay?” She kissed his lips delicately, only letting her tongue line his bottom lip, not slipping in, but giving both of them a hint of their flavor. “Shh,” Alora soon protested, silencing him once again by the same gesture. “I’ll always put you back together if you want me to. And you’re not weak. By admitting this you’re more courageous then you’ll ever know.”
She tugged on his hand, thumb tracing the ridges of his knuckles. “Follow me,” Alora insisted, leading him down the hall to the bedroom, sheets still messy, pillows ruffled, the mark of two youths that were very distraught. “Lay down and I’ll be with you until you fall asleep. I’ll take your nightmares away, every one of them. I promise. ”
Skyler was to weak to protest. To tired to try and point out that it was morning and he didn’t want Alora wasting her day on him. But she had already woven her fingers into his and was pulling his trembling person into their bedroom; the white nest of material still curled and creased from where the two youths had laid in amongst them.
With a sniff Skyler scrubbed at his eyes with the coarse fabric of his shirt sleeve; dragging any reminanse of tears from their place. Erasing the silvery tracks of the fallen. It felt nice, sliding into the cool presence of the sheets. Tired head falling into the plump pillow, his hair fanning out like loops of gold thread across the material.
Skyler bore the battle scars of what months of physical and mental abuse do to a person. His face; mottled and ma-zed with the sponge effect splodges of violet that had almost faded to invisibility. Heavily hung lower lids that craved sleep; chapped lips that needed moisture. Skyler was a mess inside and out but next to him, her hands still folded into his own, dark voids of colour, bottomless and infinite baring into his was all the medication he needed. She was his antidote despite her belief to be his venom. She was what would eventually bring him back out into the light and out of the dark.
Skyler snuggled into her, like a child craving contact. His arms curling around her neck, head lost in her chest. Tears stabbed behind his closed lids; the drops a result of fatigue, weariness and more obviously sadness. He needed to cry, to let all the poison drip from within before the pair tried to rebuild and cover over the cracks in his foundations. So thats what he did he cried. Harrowing sobs making his chest jolt. A salty wash drenching her shirt.
“I was never a bad person ‘Lor…I just did bad things.” Skylers statement was open and empty; up for interpretation. He decided that after moths of holding his burdens close and keeping his secrets locked away that he owed Alora in sight into a world he wanted to forget. “I think I owe it to you…I think you deserve to know everything.”
sage-moriaty replied to your post: Huh, It figures…
((ooc: the coincidence actually freaks me out a little. Haa))It fits in the the storyline perfectally! + HELLOOOOOOOOOO! WELCOME! I’M LUCY!
You are right. Wait. Did you just say your name was Lucy.
omg. I MET A LUCY. I can die happy.I’m Katherine by the way! :3
YES YES I’M LUCY! WHAT SO SPECIAL ABOUT LUCY?! IT’S JUST LITTLE OLD ME! (EITHER WAY..I AM HAPPY FOR YOU!)
hello Kathrine :D I can tell I’m gonna like you already thehehehehe
Scraaaape in here I’m Kristie :D HEEEY<33
2:00 PM
Well isnt everyone keen this morning
its like you all forgot.
Just for a while. Normal. I just need the stability for a while.
yeah…Okay well only if you’re sure? If you get sick of me just say. Thank you. You’re an amazing cook so anything you make will be better than what I do. Then…can we just go to bed? I’m so tired…so so tired and I think now, now you know I might be able to get to sleep without anything. Now that I know you’re there…helping me with my nightmares this time.I’ll never forget.
I don’t care if it’s weeks, or even months. We’ll be as normal as you want.
Food and then going to bed sounds perfect. I’ll cuddle you until you fall asleep just like you did for me. And I’ll make sure to stay beside you all night. No more pills. No more false ways of slumber. Just you and me… got it?
Never thought I’d here you say normal..<3
Alora…you’re too good for me. You’re just perfect. I just want to snuggle up to you and cry. I want to get this all out of my system so we can start a fresh tomorrow. Okay no more pills…I promise. Just you and me. Just you and me…Got it! I love you.
That sounds perfect. Normal has never sounded so nice.
Yeah…I haven’t showered since sunday but..but I can do it. I can sort it out. But the food situation…I fucking suck. You know this…but I don’t want you to feel like you have to do everything for me…but if..if you wouldn’t mind then I’d be really grateful baby. Not since sunday either, I’ve felt too sick.
I know I’m one for havoc, but yeah…normal is nice. Really nice.
I don’t feel like I have to do everything. I want to do everything for you. I want you to feel better and actually eat something that doesn’t look like it might poison you in your fridge. I’ll get to work on a light meal soon while you’re showering. I think it’ll help just to clean yourself up a bit.I love you. Just..remember that, alright?
Just for a while. Normal. I just need the stability for a while.
yeah…Okay well only if you’re sure? If you get sick of me just say. Thank you. You’re an amazing cook so anything you make will be better than what I do. Then…can we just go to bed? I’m so tired…so so tired and I think now, now you know I might be able to get to sleep without anything. Now that I know you’re there…helping me with my nightmares this time.
I’ll never forget.
Stop being nice to me. Willow…you don’t know how much I love you…you’re seriously my best friend.
Look Sky..*realises that he’s crying*Oh G-Oh no, Sky..I care about you too. I don’t just hang around you for the great reputation and the quality cigarettes, you know. You’re very important to me, little one. Which is why your big sister Willow is here for whatever you need to cheer up.
Now listen carefully Sky, I am going to let you off because you were there for me on that day we do not speak of when I was a wreck. So I am allocating you the next…..hmm…fifteen minutes to cry on my shoulder, moan, curse, throw a tantrum if you feel like it. After that you will be pulling yourself together because you are better than this Skyler and we both know.. this..is not..your fault.
You’re not one of them anymore Sky. They own you just as much as they own the rest of us.
Willow.
It’s been so hard. So hard and…and first the carnival…then…I met Alora and things got better…they got so much fucking better but then i don’t know what happened but…I couldn’t stop and everyday things got worse…worse than before when I got like this. Then the…the near rape and then Neil, I felt so bad. Guilt eats at me everyday, sometimes i can’t even gather my thoughts enough to get out of bed. I need help.
I know…I know but it’s hard. Hard to forget.
Simple…I like the sound of this. Can we just do what we used to do…stay in bed all day and…eat breakfast when we should be eating dinner and I can watch you paint and we can walk Gunner and share showers and watch whatever you want on tv…I just want things to be normal.
I’m going to try really hard and then when I’m better…when…when I’m stable I’m going to fix things. Fix everything.
Like you said, baby steps. I want to stay inside..for a while anyway.
Of course we can. We can watch those stupid shows that have nothing to do with reality, cuddle in bed until we realize that we haven’t even changed into actual clothes, play with Gunner who’s been mirroring both of our moods. Things will go back to normal. I promise.
There’s nothing to fix, Skyler. You getting better will be reward enough.
And that’s fine. Do you want me to ready a shower or make you something to eat? I swear, Sky… you look like you haven’t eaten in such a long time.
That sounds perfect. Normal has never sounded so nice.
Yeah…I haven’t showered since sunday but..but I can do it. I can sort it out. But the food situation…I fucking suck. You know this…but I don’t want you to feel like you have to do everything for me…but if..if you wouldn’t mind then I’d be really grateful baby. Not since sunday either, I’ve felt too sick.
Okay…like what?
No I will make it up to you. I’ll have a lot of time to think about it and it’ll be perfect…like you. Sick. That word just…I need to come to terms with it though..I need to get better. I am sick…
Am I under house arrest again? [laughs wearily] honestly I don’t want to go out…I don’t want to see anyone. Not until…well. Is that cowardly?
Simple things. Sleeping under the stars. Going out for a walk. Baby steps.
Sky, it’s not wrong to be scared about admitting that you’re sick. It’s brave that you’re at least asking for help. Most people don’t.. you’re already becoming better just by doing that.
I’m not placing you under house arrest. You’re free to do as you please; whatever helps.
Simple…I like the sound of this. Can we just do what we used to do…stay in bed all day and…eat breakfast when we should be eating dinner and I can watch you paint and we can walk Gunner and share showers and watch whatever you want on tv…I just want things to be normal.
I’m going to try really hard and then when I’m better…when…when I’m stable I’m going to fix things. Fix everything.
Like you said, baby steps. I want to stay inside..for a while anyway.
